Tips
Summer Off Schedule: The Quiet Struggle of Feeling Disconnected
Summer is often pictured as freedom, late nights, no alarms, spontaneous plans, and endless sunshine. And in a lot of ways, it is that. But what people don’t always talk about is the strange in-between feeling that can come with it: losing your routine, drifting from friends, and feeling more disconnected than expected.
When school is in session, life has structure built in. You see the same people every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes between classes. There are shared routines, inside jokes, and a natural rhythm that keeps friendships active without much effort. But once summer starts, that rhythm disappears almost overnight.
When “Free Time” Feels Less Free
At first, having no schedule sounds amazing. Sleep in, stay up late, do whatever you want. But after a while, that lack of structure can start to feel like floating with no direction. Days blur together. Plans don’t always happen. And even when you want to reach out to friends, it’s easy to assume they’re busy, or to fall into the habit of waiting instead of initiating.
Friendships Feel Different in the Summer
One of the hardest parts of summer is realizing that “out of sight” can sometimes turn into “out of touch.” During the school year, friendships are maintained almost automatically. In the summer, they require more intention. And when everyone is in a different routine, it’s normal for communication to slow down. That doesn’t mean friendships are ending, it just means they’re shifting. But it can still feel isolating when you’re the one waiting for a message or trying to make plans that don’t line up.
The Quiet Feeling of Disconnection
Even when you’re technically “doing things,” summer can still feel emotionally quiet. You might be surrounded by people sometimes, but still feel a bit separate from your usual support system. Social media can make this worse by seeing others constantly out, traveling, or always with friends can make your own slower days feel like you’re missing out, even when you’re just living your own version of summer.
Finding Your Own Rhythm Again
The good news is that this feeling doesn’t last forever, and there are ways to ease it:
- Creating a simple daily routine (even something small like a morning walk or set meal times)
- Making plans ahead of time instead of waiting for last-minute invites
- Checking in with friends regularly, even if it’s just a quick message
- Finding small things that anchor your day, like a hobby, workout, or creative project
- Accepting that not every day has to be “productive” to be meaningful
A Different Kind of Summer
Summer doesn’t always have to be loud or constantly social to be good. Sometimes it’s about learning how to be okay in quieter moments, and realizing that connection doesn’t disappear just because it changes pace.Friendships stretch, routines shift, and you adjust. And somewhere in that adjustment, you start building a different kind of balance, one that includes both connection and independence.
A Summer That Feels Like You
Summer is a season of change. Friendships shift, routines look different, and there’s often a little bit of figuring things out along the way. But change can also create space for growth. It can be a chance to discover new interests, strengthen relationships, and learn what helps you feel connected.
Whether your summer is full of adventures or made up of quieter moments, there’s room for it to be meaningful. Sometimes finding your own rhythm is the first step toward feeling more connected, both with others and with yourself.
First Time Joining a Upopolis Group? Tips to Help You Feel Ready!
- Be kind to yourself, it’s normal to feel different emotions. Others in the group are
probably feeling similarly, whether that is scared, excited, or nervous about joining for
the first time. As research shows that nearly everyone feels nervous before starting
something new. - You can always ask! Remember we are always available: If you are not sure if a
program might be a good fit for you or have questions after registering, you can always
email support@upopolis.com. They can answer any questions you may have, like what to
expect, so you can feel ready. - Give yourself time to get used to it: If you are not ready to participate in a group, take
the time you need to feel comfortable. Joining a group is an important step, and we want
you to participate without stress. - Goal setting: Whether that means just listening for the first time, only saying your name,
or speaking for a small part of an activity, setting small personal goals may be helpful. - Join our game nights! Participating in our monthly game nights can be a fun way to try
out online programs and meet new people in a relaxed environment.
Getting started at Upopolis can feel like a big step! If you need time to adjust or try something
new, Upopolis will always be there to help you through it!
Remember these tips: ask questions, take your time and be kind to yourself, set small reachable
goals, and try a game night if you want to start slowly.
You can also check out these posts to learn more about what we do at Upopolis and hear what
past members have to say about their experiences!
“Upopolis has changed my life” – Jenna’s journey
Our youth members weigh in: 4 reasons why Upopolis is the place to be!
It’s important to remember that Upopolis is all about creating community, and how you take part
in that is always up to you!
Joining a group for the first time can be scary, especially for teens and young adults. You might wonder if you’ll fit in, who will join, and what will happen in the group. It’s very normal to feel
nervous about online programs if you’ve never tried it before!
At Upopolis, we use our groups and programs as a way to help youth meet others, make friends
with those “who get it”, and feel supported.
If you are feeling unsure about joining a group, the tips below may help!
Living Fully, Even When You’re Not Sure How You’ll Feel
Have you ever made plans and caught yourself thinking, “I hope I’ll feel up to it by the time this comes around”? Living with chronic illness can mean living with uncertainty. You might not know how your body will feel next week, or even by the end of the day. It’s completely normal if that uncertainty feels overwhelming, frustrating, or even scary at times. Let’s talk about ways to make those feelings more manageable.
When a lot is going on, it’s easy to get caught up in things outside our control. Sometimes, we need to slow down. Take a breath and re-evaluate where you want to focus your energy. Your locus of control might include following your treatment regimens, focusing on school or extracurriculars, communicating your needs, or resting when your body asks for it. You may not be able to control every symptom or variable, but you can control how you respond and how you move forward.
You could try:
Creating a diagram of your worries and dividing them into what you can and cannot control
Making a priority list of what matters most to you right now
Creating a plan to address what is within your control
Drawing a “choice map” to help you reflect on and work through stressors.
When your body changes, your plans might need to change too. Flexibility doesn’t mean you don’t care about spending time with others. Often, the hardest part of honouring your needs is the guilt that can come with it. Remember: no one can be perfectly available for everything. Being flexible with yourself means you are listening to
Consider:
Creating a Plan A, B, or even C based on how you might feel physically and emotionally
Grounding yourself in small, steady routines
Packing a “just-in-case” kit with items that help support you during unexpected moments
Plans shift. Unexpected things happen. That’s a normal part of life. We don’t need to solve tomorrow’s problems today, and we can’t predict exactly how everything will unfold. What we can do is celebrate our wins- even the small ones. You may not control every symptom or every set back, but you can choose your next step. And you can remind yourself, again and again:
You are allowed to build a life that works with your body, not against it.
By, Elysia, Upopolis Intern 2026
What It’s Like to Be a Sibling: Your Feelings Matter Too.
When your brother or sister has a medical condition or spends a lot of time in the hospital, it can change the way life feels in a big way. A lot of attention naturally goes toward the sibling who is sick, and even though that makes sense, it doesn’t mean you stop having needs or feelings of your own. Your life shifts too, and that deserves to be acknowledged.
You might feel worried about what’s happening, or confused because things at home don’t feel the same anymore. Maybe routines have changed, or your parents seem busier or more stressed than usual. Some siblings say they feel left out or invisible during this time. Others feel guilty—guilty for being healthy, for wanting things to go back to normal, or even for getting frustrated or annoyed.
Here’s something important to remember: all these feelings and more are normal. You’re allowed to feel upset, tired, proud, scared, or hopeful—sometimes all in the same day. Being a sibling in this situation takes strength, even if you don’t always feel strong. What you’re going through matters.
Talking about your feelings is one of the most helpful things you can do. A parent, a friend, a teacher, or a child life specialist can help you work through what’s on your mind. You don’t have to handle everything on your own.
It also helps to make space for yourself, even in small ways. Write down your thoughts, listen to music that calms you, step outside for some fresh air, or do something that makes you feel like you. Taking care of your mental and emotional health isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. You can care about your sibling while also caring about yourself.
Here are some Coping Tips:
1. Your emotions are normal — even the messy ones.
• Name what you’re feeling.
• Journal, use a notes app, or record a voice memo.
• Make a “feelings playlist” to help you process emotions.
2. You deserve support — and it’s okay to ask for it.
• Check in weekly with a trusted adult.
• Tell someone when you just need them to listen.
• Write a note or text if talking feels hard.
3. Small self-care moments can help on tough days.
• Take a few slow, deep breaths.
• Do something that makes you feel like yourself.
• Spend 10 minutes on an activity that makes you feel calm and happy, like stretching, doodling, or playing a game.
4. You play an important role in your family.
• Set one small boundary for yourself each day.
• Remind yourself: “My needs are valid.”
• Make time for something unrelated to illness or hospital life.
First Month of School Check-In
As we reach the end of the first month of school, it’s a great time to pause and check in with yourself. How are you coping so far?
The first month back often brings lots of change—new routines, new teachers, and sometimes even big transitions like figuring out how to balance schoolwork with an illness. That’s a lot to carry.
Taking a few minutes to reflect on your experience can really help. You might want to write your thoughts down in a journal or even share them with someone you trust.
Here are some questions to think about:
- What is something you thought would be challenging, but wasn’t?
- Who can you talk to about your illness?
- Who can you talk to when you are feeling sad, stressed, or anxious?
- What are you worried about moving forward? What can you do to cope with this feeling?
- What are three things you are proud of yourself for doing this month?
After reflecting, remember: it’s completely normal to feel stressed, upset, or worried. Navigating school while managing your health is hard—and it’s okay to admit that.
Here are some ways to cope with the challenges of balancing school and illness:
- Talk to your teachers. Let them know if you need accommodations—like extra time on assignments due to an appointment or if you may need to leave class. Sharing your needs helps them support you.
- Lean on friends you trust. A good support system can make a big difference. When friends understand what’s going on, they can support you in ways that really help.
- Take breaks when you need to. School can be overwhelming, so give yourself permission to rest and do activities you enjoy.
- Prioritize sleep. Rest is powerful—it boosts your mood, focus, and ability to handle tough situations.
- Find an outlet. Whether it’s journaling, music, art, gaming, or fitness, having a way to express yourself can ease stress.
Most of all, remember: it’s okay to ask for help from friends, family, or loved ones. Your health and well-being is important!
Take a deep breath—you’ve got this.
Scroll Smart: Setting Healthy Social Media Boundaries
If you’re a young person living with illness, social media can feel like both your best friend and your biggest challenge. On one hand, it helps you stay connected, distract yourself during tough times, and even find support from others who “get it.” But on the other hand, endless scrolling, comparing yourself to others, or receiving negative comments can take a toll on your mental health. This post is for you—youth who use social media and want to keep it a positive space while managing the challenges of illness.
Research shows that social media can boost connection and belonging when used in healthy ways, but too much time online can increase stress, anxiety, and feelings of isolation. It’s all about finding balance.
Here are a few ways you can set healthy boundaries online:
1. Limit your screen time.
It’s easy to lose track of time online. Try setting a timer or using built-in app limits to remind yourself to log off. Even short breaks give your mind and body a chance to rest.
2. Notice how you feel after scrolling.
Do you feel better, inspired, or connected after being online? Or do you feel drained, left out, or upset? Use those feelings as a signal for when it’s time to step back.
3. Choose who you follow wisely.
Fill your feed with accounts that make you feel supported, uplifted, or entertained in a positive way. It’s okay to unfollow or mute people if their posts leave you feeling worse about yourself.
4. Protect your privacy.
Sharing your story can be powerful, but remember—you get to decide what and how much to share. Keep your personal information safe, and only connect with people you trust.
5. Make space for offline joy.
Try swapping some screen time for activities that recharge you—like reading, listening to music, or spending time with friends and family in person. Balance helps you stay grounded.
Conclusion
Social media can be an amazing tool, especially when you’re going through challenges with your health. The key is to use it mindfully. By setting limits, paying attention to your feelings, and protecting your space online, you can make sure social media works for you—not against you.
If you want more tips on managing stress and staying connected, check out other Upopolis blog posts on [wellness and coping strategies]. And remember—Upopolis is a safe space designed just for youth like you, where you can connect, share, and belong.
So the next time you pick up your phone, ask yourself: “Will this scroll support me?” If the answer is yes, scroll on. If not, give yourself permission to step back—you deserve it.
U Got This: From School Days to Summer Ways
Our Upopolis Child Life Specialists help support youth through big changes-and the end of the school year is one of them. Whether you’re moving up a grade, switching schools, starting a new treatment, graduating, or heading into summer break, it’s normal to feel a mix of emotions.
Here are some tips to take care of yourself during this transition:
Talk About Your Feelings
Feeling excited and nervous? That’s okay! Change brings up all kinds of emotions. Talking to someone you trust; a parent, teacher, or friend- can help you feel calmer and more prepared.
Look Back & Celebrate the School Year You’ve done a lot this school year- even if it didn’t always feel easy. Before jumping into what’s next, take a moment to notice how far you’ve come.
Try one of these:
- Capture Memories: Take photos or write down your favorite moments or accomplishments on slips of paper.
- Top 3 List: What were your 3 favorite memories? 3 things you’re proud of? 3 things you learned?
- Notes: Write a quick thank-you or goodbye note to a teacher, friend, or even yourself!
- Year-in-Review: Draw a picture or make a playlist that captures your year’s vibe.
Get Ready for What’s Ahead
Big changes coming up? Sometimes new changes like a new school or schedule can feel overwhelming, but a little prep goes a long way.
New school? New schedule? Ask questions, take a tour, or talk to someone who’s been there. Knowing what to expect can help to feel safe and prepared.
Keep a Bit of Routine
Summer should be fun and relaxing, but your mind still likes some structure! Keep a loose routine for sleep, meals, and fun so your days feel balanced.
Even small habits—like a morning walk, journaling, or set mealtimes—can help your days feel more predictable and calm.
Remember: You’re Growing
Transitions are not always easy, but each step you’ve taken shows how much you’ve grown. You’ve already overcome so much, and you’re ready for what’s next. Be proud of yourself, and don’t hesitate to ask for support whenever you need it — you’re not alone on this journey.
Embracing the Now: Tips for Staying Present
As summer fades and the holidays come and go, it’s easy to find ourselves caught in a loop of “once this is over, then I’ll…” thoughts. “Once summer is over, I’ll slow down.” “Once winter break hits, I’ll enjoy life more.” But before we know it, those “once” moments can stretch into years!
Have you ever found yourself in the same boat? If so, let’s explore some ways to break this cycle and truly be present in our lives, starting today.
1. Wake Up Early
Waking up a little earlier than everyone else allows you do to something you want to do, like enjoy a cup of coffee (or your favorite drink), check emails, or just reflect on what you want to accomplish for the day. This simple change can make you feel more centered and prepared to tackle whatever comes you way.
Tip: Set your alarm just 15-30 minutes earlier and make it a peaceful morning ritual. Use this time to journal, meditate, or just enjoy the stillness.
2. Practice the 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Exercise
Ever have those days where everything feels like a blur? You blink, and suddenly the day is gone! To combat this, try the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding exercise. It’s a helpful way to reconnect with the present.
Here’s how it works:
- 5 things you can see: Look around and notice your environment.
- 4 things you can hear: Tune into the sounds around you, whether it’s music, chatter, or nature.
- 3 things you can smell: Take a moment to inhale and identify scents.
- 2 things you can touch: Focus on what’s in touching your skin – like your chair or your phone.
- 1 thing you can taste: Pop something in your mouth or just pay attention to the taste lingering in your mouth.
Tip: Whenever you feel overwhelmed or disconnected, take a few minutes to do this exercise. It’s a great way to center yourself!
3. Limit Screen Time
Let’s be real: screens can easily distract us from the world around us. While technology is great, too much can lead to zoning out and missing out on real-life experiences. Set limits on your social media and phone usage, especially during the times you want to connect with friends and family.
Tip: Try a “tech-free hour” each day where you engage in activities like reading, playing games, or just hanging out with people face-to-face.
4. Engage in Mindful Activities
Finding activities that encourage mindfulness can significantly enhance your ability to stay present. Whether it’s art, sports, or simply going for a walk, engaging fully in what you love can help ground you in the moment.
Tip: Choose one activity that you enjoy and dedicate some time each week to it without distractions.
5. Reflect on Your Day
At the end of each day, take a few moments to reflect on what happened. What were the highlights? What did you learn? This practice not only helps you appreciate your experiences but also keeps you connected to your emotions and thoughts.
Tip: Keep a journal where you jot down your reflections or even a simple list of what you’re grateful for.
Final Thoughts
Life is happening right now, and it’s easy to miss out when we’re always waiting for the next big thing. By implementing these tips, we can start to break free from that cycle of “once” and fully embrace each moment.